The Great Trip: Living in a Van down by the river!!!!

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Living in a Van down by the river!!!!

I have now had fulfilled my biggest adolescent fantasy! Like many of you I grew up in the 70’s with such role models and Jack, Larry, and Mr. Roper. There was also the inspiring freedom and discovery of Mork with Mindy. Lest we forget the most cool of them all, Fred and the Gang in their Mystery Machine. As a child it was quite a mystery to me what a guy would be doing with an apartment on wheels, eating Scooby Snacks and solving ghost stories. However, there is a magical moment in a young man’s journey to adulthood when he realizes what Jack and Larry were doing at the Regal Beagle, that Mork and Mindy were more than just roommates, and what makes a Scooby Snack that yummy.

Then, just like a clapper turning on a disco-ball in your head you realize the possibilities of having a bed in the back of a van. Once you pass that magic moment your boyhood is over and your journey to chest-hair and gold medallion necklaces is almost complete. Ladies, if you are still reading, and gentleman, hormone bags if you will, I am now in possession of such a van, complete with a bed in the back! Yes, it is that cool. Mr. Roper, eat your heart out!

I would be remiss if I did not point out that there are some keen differences in this reality that were completely unforeseen as a boy aged sixteen. Firstly, being happily married does somewhat curtail the desire to cruise to The Regal Beagle. Also, I had pictured a late 70’s Chevy van with a pair of bubble windows on the back sides, not a late 90’s Toyota Mommy-Van with a bubble top like a blue Jiffy Pop package about to blow. In my wildest fantasies I had never pictured a kitchen next to the bed; my fantasies didn’t require cooked food. In all reality this is really more than just a love-palace-on-wheels; this is our new home. We are now living in a spacious 38 sq. ft. of all purpose living space.

Our rental car company took a small fleet of mid-nineties Toyota HIACE mini-vans to a boat builder who ripped out everything rear of the driver’s area and replaced it with two molded plastic bench seats and a kitchenette. The kitchenette consists of a 3- cubic foot refrigerator, two portable propane burners bolted to the plastic, and a small cold water sink fed by a 5-gallon water container strapped directly under the sink; the sink drains out a pipe next to the exhaust pipe. This is a far cry from the all stainless-steel kitchen with double ovens that we used to cook in, but we have been able to prepare some comfort food meals like Ramen, Spaghetti with Bolognese sauce, and our most ambitious meal attempted – beef tacos with homemade guacamole, chips and salsa. Not too bad for van camping.

Now, about that bed I mentioned: it’s our favorite superhero right now. By day, a mild mannered bench seat with storage-a-plenty; after the sun sets our hero changes, with planks of wood sliding from hidden slots and a flurry of cushions tumbling into place like pieces of a puzzle, then presto-chango we have a bed. Once again, our current sleeping arrangements are a far, far cry from the pleasant mattress that we had back in a former life. The bed itself is more comfortable than I had expected when we are parked on a level surface – not possible as often as one would hope.

The inverted row boat that serves as the roof of the car allows for a few bonus comforts, like standing erect when the bed is not in use and room for a microwave, which only works when we are plugged into a power spike at a Holiday Park, a.k.a. RV Park. We have designated the primary use of the microwave to be dry goods storage, lacking a pantry as it were. We have done our best and succeeded in making this little van our love-palace-on-wheels as we tramp and traipse around this amazing country, fulfilling our dreams and challenging ourselves to new adventures.

Tune in next time when I reveal that the most conspicuously absent of all the items from our new love-palace-on-wheels appears to be a steering-wheel and peddles on the left side of the car.